A little whisper in the dark

Loss

Today was not a good day. A terse message in the morning brought the news that a friend's grandmother passed away suddenly (much in the same way as my own grandfather did). A cruise on the Togoparts forums revealed someone lost a bike while parking it in town for a couple of hours.

We tend to take things for granted. Expect a securely chained bike to be waiting for us to ride it when we return. A grandmother who showers unconditional love and attention to her grandchild.

It is when we lose it, that we discover, we love each a little more than we thought we ever did.

posted by Chung Leong @ 4:37 AM 0 comments

Freedom

...... what I wanted when sought to end a near 3 year relationship. I got my way, had my freedom. But to quote one of my favourite music groups, Lighthouse Family,

......and if I relocated,
to where the grass is greener,
maybe,
I'll be happy again.
But i'm a little bit disappointed,
now I've got my freedom,
but I'm still, looking over the fence......

......you'll always want what you haven't got......



Close friends would have been hit with an offer to send this song over online, in the hopes they would somehow understand how I feel, from time to time. Some get it, some don't. Others can't even hear the lyrics clearly.

The way things, human mentality is, you work long and hard to get something, then when you get too much of it, you want to take a break from it. And so the cycle repeats. Perhaps even Bill Gates gets tired of thinking of what to do with his billions, and just leaves them in the bank. And so the paradox results. Do I want it or don't I want it? How much is too much?

And in between that relationship, girls have come into and left my life, but those that I fancied, were not willing to be part of my life, and those that wanted to be part of my life, I didn't fancy enough to make a real effort.

I no longer hold much hope for any particular girl, but I can't deny that I miss having a hand to hold while walking down the street, someone to talk to when there's a quarrel at home, someone to fall asleep on my shoulder on the bus on the way back.

Wouldn't that be nice to have again? But like everything else, there's always strings attached......

posted by Chung Leong @ 3:01 AM 0 comments

The Longest Nanosecond

What can you do in that amount of time?

It is less than a blink of an eye.

It is the time it takes to fire the synapses (sic?) of your nervous system.

It is the heartbeat of a rodent.

It is a flash of lightning splitting a rainy night sky.

A few hundreths of a second.

It is what separated my 4th placed car from the 3rd placed car in today's radio control car rally race. I may not have taken outright victory, but being there to challenge for it, and nearly taking it, is a greater prize, knowing that it can be done again. Not a real victory, then but a psychological one that I can build upon.

We'll be there the next race.

posted by Chung Leong @ 1:25 AM 0 comments

Flash in the pan?

Have you ever done something exceptionally well, surprising everyone around, including yourself, but when the time comes around to do it again, to prove it wasn't a fluke, there is that question of "Can I do it?".

Of course, one can "Just Do It", like a certain retired basketball great has been doing. Acrobatic moves, under the basket, jumping from the free throw line to dunk the ball, yeah sure he can do it alright. I wonder how he felt the first time he stepped onto the basketball court as the top draft pick for his team, with all the hopes of a saggy franchise resting on him.

Only when he could do it time and time again, game after game, year after year, did he become the greatest basketball player ever.

Be like Mike? No, not exactly. But I guess you get the point, or you shouldn't be reading this blog.

posted by Chung Leong @ 10:45 AM 0 comments

Quotable quote

Beauty fades with time, but character matures like a fine wine.

posted by Chung Leong @ 2:04 AM 0 comments

Courage

With a large number of SARS patients being medical staff, I constantly wonder how they can get up each day and walk back into that hotbed of potentially lethal virii that surrounds their workplace.

Respect is most definitely due.

posted by Chung Leong @ 12:09 AM 0 comments